The LadyKillers meets Indiana Jones

One of the extraordinary things about human events is that the unthinkable becomes thinkable.

-          Salman Rushdie

Satire, meet Rushdie – O’ I think these two are already acquainted. Rushdie’s short story the Prophet’s Hair contains an interesting degree of religious piety, family, and even humor – not particularly in that order but more meshed around with each other.

The first thought that came to mind about the story was thinking what the exact reaction was in the strict Muslim faith about using a sacred relic, Muhammed’s hair in a vial, in a story about theft, murder, and even miracles.

Now we all know because of the increasing attention in the Middle East that the subject of religion, particularly Islam, is a touchy subject. Let me re-phrase that an untouchable subject to most. But seeing as were American and all, and we love poking other nationalities with sticks, let’s be honest.

This was hilarious, not because of the death or family dis-functionality, but because of the underlying or even unconscious power this vial contained. I mean Rushdie gave this Muslim relic the exact type of power that has been bestowed upon it by its Muslim followers. This all seeing all knowing vial obviously has a mind of its own, (very much like The Ring in Lord of the Rings), it gives a truth serum to the money lender and head of the family and completely “humbles” him to the basics of the Muslim following. He prays five times a day, scolds his daughter for not covering up, unmistakably shows his disappointment in his son’s intelligence, and releases his marital frustration to his wife.

Also in the wake of this religious piety his family breaks down and refuses to acknowledge his devout following, and they frown on his blunt and overly simplistic manner when it comes to the vial. The irony in the situation…the family was just spoiled. Not ever being used to the strict Muslim rules of the household they crack before they even believe. Now don’t get me wrong the father was also unbelievably creepy with his “precious”. I mean I expected somewhere in the story for there to be a moment of complete focus on the relic and its takeover of the father, which technically happened when he stared at it for countless hours but maybe I was just hoping for the father to turn into that gangly creature Gollum from Lord of the rings.

Now obviously there has to be a link between this story’s irony/humor and the correlation to a moral. The question that were first trying to identify is which moral to choose from? Because I think there is more than one, easily.

The one I feel surfaces the easiest is the attention to the relic as a curse or blessing. Possibly even being the same thing. I couldn’t help but notice that this story had a similar resemblance in the previous novel we read “jasmine” where there is a concept of destiny and inevitability. Maybe this vial had plans of its own and the money-lender and his family, as well as the thief Sin, had an inevitable fate all lined up. After all a relic of this magnitude is clearly possible of causing all the chaos in the world to get where it needs to be.

The vial corrected everything, made every right into wrong and every wrong pay the consequence. It destroyed (literally) a family that seemed to have everything and at the same time came off as a very superficial group that was never truly honest with one another. I mean the kids quickly assembled against the father, even though he was getting strict, they still conspired against him. The wife went mad for quite possibly not having put work herself into the failing marriage. The thief was ratted out by the same person who was trying to hire him, and was killed which one would argue was a perfect manner of revenge for subjecting his sons to disfigured lives. Then his sons for so profitably exploiting their disfigurement and begging their way through lives were given the grace of “normality” something they obviously would have no idea how to survive in. And the one woman we knew the least about, the one who still had innocence to the reader was the quiet blind wife of the thief Sin. Who finally at the end was given the grace of sight to accompany her late in her life.

Yea I guess the moral is don’t f**k with what isn’t yours…because it takes care of itself.

On a final note, just to add some humor to my article, I really got the sense with this story that Hollywood movies really do just get ideas out of past stories and or novels. I mean I hate to say it but originality really is dead or quite possibly extinct! If you’ve ever seen the movie “The Lady Killer” with Tom Hanks and Marlon Wayans the same madness ensues when they try to pull of a bank job while trying to keep it a secret from and old religious woman. Hilariously that old woman ends up being their demise. Indiana Jones also came to mind for this article, if you remove that treasure from the alter without having the skill to replace it….you better run!